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Tuesday, April 27, 2010

What's In a Name?

This may seem odd, but I haven't been able to write because I haven't landed upon a code name for my son that I want to use.

Crazy, huh?

I'm one of those people...the perfect codependent...who always needs to have the most unimportant things be perfect.  I can't write about life with a son who struggles with a potential mental illness (in other words, undiagnosed) and addiction because I can't think of a name for him yet?

That's right.  That's how my mind works.  If I can't come up with a good name now, I figure, I'll think of one later and that will confuse readers, and that would make me a bad blogger -- and then it follows that I must also be a bad person.

These are the mind demons I wrestle with.  Was I always like this?  Or did being married to an alcoholic do me in?  I wrestle with those questions too.  In fact, I do a lot of mental wrestling with my own mind.  It's exhausting, and like the alcoholic who wishes he/she could drink without it being a problem, I wish I could be in my own head without having to wrestle with it.

I'll be back...soon.  Just as soon as I figure out a name.

2 comments:

  1. I don't think it is crazy. The sad fact remains no matter what code name you give him, the only thing everyone will call him is, addict, just like my son..... maybe one day, they will say recovering addict.

    Keep the faith. And keep smiling!

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  2. I hate that crazy mind wrestling stuff, too. But there *is* something in a name--I don't think it's weird to want to find something that fits.

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