Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Deep Breath

*Deep breath*

Now that most of the major boxes are unpacked, Kyd is not wreaking daily havoc on our lives, I don't have to worry about my lights shutting off or having a roof over our heads or where the next meal is going to come from...

Now that I've been able to catch up on some major paperwork, now that the pain in my body has subsided (temporarily or permanently I'm not sure yet)...

I'm finding that I can't relax. 

That swarm of angry worries is still swarming around up there in the closet I shut them into. No way I'm throwing that door open, but I also know they're not going away on their own.  Obviously suffocating them in the dark didn't work. 

I keep saying this, it's time for me to go to a meeting, and it's time for me to sit my tush down on the cushion and meditate. 

These two things are like calling in an expert worry exterminator, except instead of pumping a toxic gas through the keyhole (that's how I'd try to handle things), he's somehow able to coax each worry wasp out from under the door one by one, and then whisper something in their tiny little ear.  After, they transform into dragonflies with iridescent and colorful wings, and light upon the windowsill just once to sit in the sunlight breathing before flying off to find a flower on which to perch prettily.  

Meetings. Meditation. 

Do it.

1 comment:

  1. "Take the diamond seat," they say in Zen. Annoying Zen wankers.

    I hope you find some peace deep inside, where everything is still.